The short answer

Toddlers have stormy periods just like babies do: a rough stretch of extra meltdowns and boundary-testing, followed by a leap in development. They're normal and temporary. Keep boundaries consistent and kind, stay calm through the meltdowns, and avoid buying peace with bribes or screens. The storm passes, and a new skill appears.

Many parents are familiar with the "stormy periods" for babies that a certain app warns you about. Whether you call them stormy periods or regressions, they're characterised by a stretch of increased crying and fussiness, followed by the baby emerging with a new skill they've learned. The theory is that the brain work required to learn a new skill or hit a new developmental stage makes babies fussier in the lead-up.

Well, guess what: the same is true for toddlers. The difference is there's no app to predict which months the stormy periods will land in or how long they'll last. Babies follow a fairly predictable pattern across their first year, but toddlers show far more variation in both timing and which specific skills are emerging. If you pay close attention, though, you'll notice the pattern repeat: a stormy stretch of a few days or weeks, then a sudden calm, and you'll realise your toddler has taken a leap in some area of development. Maybe their language has taken off, they've landed a new gross motor skill, or they're suddenly understanding far more than they used to.

How do you manage a stormy period without losing your mind?

The first thing is simply to know that this is supposed to happen. It's a normal part of healthy development, not a sign that something has gone wrong. When you find yourself thinking "where has my sweet child gone?", the good news is that your sweet child is still there. They're just under construction for a while.

Hold your boundaries steady

The best way through is to stay consistent in how you approach boundaries and meltdowns. Boundaries need to be age-appropriate, consistent, and kind. Your toddler may test them far more than usual during a stormy period, but this is exactly the time they need to learn that you're the confident, loving leader who can hold steady through the storm.

Stay calm through the meltdowns

As for the meltdowns themselves, it's about staying calm and waiting for them to pass. When it feels like your toddler is melting down all day long, it's tempting to reach for bribery ("if you're quiet I'll give you a lolly"), distraction ("here, watch the Wiggles on my phone"), or just giving in to every request ("fine, we'll go to the playground even though it's pouring"). The problem is that toddlers are wired to notice patterns, and they learn fast that a meltdown is a reliable way to get a particular response. Hold the line through the hard moments, and you'll come out the other side of the stormy period not just without new bad habits, but with a toddler who has genuinely grown.

For more on riding out the hard stretches, read Why Do Toddlers Have Tantrums?, browse my tantrum guides, or book a 1:1 consult.