The short answer

Cooking with your toddler builds real confidence, fine motor and language skills, and is one of the best ways to prevent fussy eating, all through no-pressure exposure. Make it work by preparing ahead, expecting mess and slowness, and giving them reachable counters, safe tools and jobs they can actually do.

There are so many benefits to having your toddler helping you out in the kitchen: whether it be chopping vegetables, washing fruit, mixing batter or eventually making their own breakfast! But maybe the thought of your clumsy and over confident toddler getting anywhere near the kitchen seems like a dystopian reality. I'm here to prove you wrong (kind of).

Why it's worth the mess

Looking at some of the benefits of involving your toddler in the kitchen will help you see why it's an endeavour worth pursuing.

1. Practical life skills boost confidence. The most effective way for a growing child to develop true self confidence is for them to know how to do things by themselves, and gain satisfaction from completing a real and difficult task. Especially if this is something that will help the family or make them feel more "grown up". Imagine how empowered your toddler will feel knowing that they can actually make their own toast for breakfast without needing a grown up's help!
2. Kitchen skills boost other essential skills too, such as fine motor (pouring, chopping, mixing, opening, closing containers), cognitive (sequencing recipes, learning new concepts, early science skills) and language (vocabulary, following instructions).
3. It supports a collaborative approach within the family. When everyone is involved in food preparation and cleaning, it sets the tone that everyone is responsible for helping out in the family. When children see how food is prepared, they are more likely to appreciate the meal, plus it sets the tone for children to be contributing members of the family from a very young age.
4. It prevents fussy eating and encourages food exploration. Toddlers naturally love to help out in the kitchen, use tools and be doing whatever grown up task mummy or daddy is doing. Toddlers are famous for developing fussy eating habits and limiting their diet, but the secret to preventing or fixing this is to have them help you out in the kitchen. Oftentimes when toddlers are helping you chop vegetables they can't help but sneak a few bites of capsicum just out of curiosity. Even if they don't like what they taste initially, repeated exposures will eventually lead to them expanding their palate. The secret ingredient here is that it is a no pressure environment. No one is asking them to taste or eat anything. Just touching the asparagus or washing the sweet potatoes supports their comfort with new foods and leads to them eventually trying these foods down the track.

How to actually do it (without meltdowns)

So now that you know how important it is to involve your toddler in the kitchen, how on earth do you do it without both you and your toddler having a meltdown?

1. Prepare. If you think ahead of time that you're going to have your toddler helping you with a meal, prepare ahead of time. This might look like removing any dangerous items from the prep area (sharp knives within reach) and getting all of the tools and ingredients ready. Nothing spells disaster more than a flustered parent rummaging around the pantry for an ingredient while your impatient toddler starts to take matters into their own hands.
2. Manage your expectations. Just by expecting that the meal prep is going to be slower, messier and imperfect will make a big difference. The more you give in to these elements, the smoother it will be. Cous cous will be dropped all over the floor, the milk will spill into every crevice of your kitchen drawers and eggs will be cracked on every surface imaginable (excluding the mixing bowl). The more chill you are about the mess and how long it's all taking, the more your toddler will follow suit and enjoy the process too. This will improve with practice and time, I promise!
3. Make things accessible. Imagine if you were asked to cook a meal at a counter that reached up to your nose, with knives you could barely lift and a spatula the size of your leg. In order for toddlers to learn the skills needed to help in the kitchen, they need appropriate tools. A stool or learning tower is the first place to start so that your toddler can reach the counter easily. Child safe knives are essential, as well as child sized baking equipment too. It's also important to consider your toddler's skill level and give them jobs that they can actually do. If something is too hard or requires too much supervision from a grown up, your toddler won't enjoy it and feel satisfied, which will likely lead to them misbehaving or abandoning ship and leaving the kitchen. A lot of kitchen jobs require a lot of skill, so remember that your toddler is learning and the only way they learn is from trying, starting small and observing you!

I hope that this article made you consider the small and big ways that you can include your toddler in the kitchen. I promise that the mess will create funny memories to look back on, and the small moments will build to create capable, confident and helpful toddlers!

For more mealtime help, browse my mealtime guides or book a 1:1 consult.